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How I went from “uncreative” to epic poet in two years.

Updated: May 6

I spent most of my life believing I wasn’t creative. I was the academic one in school, the corporate advertising chick, destined for a life behind a computer screen selling other people's products.  

Whenever I was asked the question, “If you could be anything in the world, what would you be?” I would say “an artist” but not one ounce of my logical brain thought that would be a possibility. 

“I’m not creative.” 

Looking back now, it’s wild to see how much that one little idea had been holding me back.

The truth is, every thought, every decision, every action we take creates the reality that manifests before us. When we don't believe ourselves to be creators, we limit ourselves to a life not of our own making. Without accessing our imagination, we follow the path society has sold us; go to university, get the job, save the deposit, buy the house. It’s all laid out, all we have to do is follow.

Lucky for me, my mind began to open when I decided to go into business with my best friend. I was the corporate mind, she was the creative. It was a match made in Heaven.

Only I quickly began to see that this wasn't entirely true. Witnessing my own power to build something from scratch and watch it grow unlocked something in me. Ideas began to flow, bigger and bigger dreams began to unfurl, my faith in myself was growing. 

I was waking up. 

When my friend asked me to write a book of poetry for her birthday as somewhat of a joke, I had no idea how much it would end up changing my life. A passion had been ignited.

The creative floodgates were now well and truly opened and once that happened, all that wasn't in alignment with my original dream was soon swiftly and dramatically washed away.

Queue the dark night of the soul!

At the time I knew there were aspects of my life that weren’t serving me. I felt conflicted and uncomfortable, and the longer I stayed where I was, the more it felt like the path I was on was heading straight for a cliff. 

I managed to muster up the courage to address one of the faulty foundations my life had been teetering upon, not realising that the rest of the tower would swiftly come crumbling down after it.

I lost many of my friends, my business, my sense of purpose, basically my entire identity in one fell swoop. I found myself in an incredibly dark place, convinced I had just ruined my whole life and questioning whether there was even a point in continuing on.

Thankfully, having just completed a wonderful book of poetry for my now estranged friend, this newfound art form was still fresh in my mind. So, after a couple of weeks of lying in bed staring blankly at a wall, I began to write about how I was feeling. 

I quickly found that the words that made their way onto the page were more than just an emotional release. Somehow the poetry I was writing seemed to come from a higher place. Like the part of me that was writing them had greater perspective on what was happening in my life and knew just what to say to lift me up and out of the hole I was in. 

Poetry became my greatest teacher, my greatest healer and what I soon concluded to be a direct line to the wisdom of my higher self. 

Though creativity had been flowing while building my business, I realized I had been using it to build someone else’s dream. My dream was to be an artist. So I began seeing this clean slate my life had been reduced to as a gift. A new foundation on which to build a life I was truly in love with. One filled with meaning, passion, creativity and purpose.

In Jan 2022, when the call to share my poetry with others became too great to ignore, I began posting them on IG under the pseudonym,, and with that, a brand new chapter had begun.

From the pile of rubble that was my life, I began rebuilding on my own terms. I moved 1400Km north to a beautiful seaside town where very quickly, I met a man and fell in love. 

I started studying all the things that had been calling me for the longest time. I took up Astrology, Human Design, Psychic Development and Shamanic Energy Training. 

I became obsessed with raising my level of awareness, learning life’s lessons, exploring the mysteries of the universe, the depths of my inner world and sharing these pursuits through poetry. 

When life fell apart the year before, after the initial shock wore off, I had made a promise to the Universe that I would write a book. I thought something nonfiction about facing the unknown or learning to love yourself, but with everything I was learning, there was now so much more I wanted to talk about. 

Then one day, in June of 2022, I was sitting at my desk and a thought crossed my mind. 

“What if I’m meant to write fiction?”

To say this thought unlocked something in me would be an understatement. What happened next could only be described as a download from the Universe. A fully formed storyline streamed across my consciousness and, for someone who has previously believed themselves uncreative, this truly was an otherworldly experience.

I began getting the story out of my head and onto paper over the next couple of weeks. I took up a course in novel writing and quickly realised how much of a marathon I was signing myself up for. This honestly felt like a 3-part series.

When the magnitude of this pursuit began to overwhelm me, I decided to park the idea for a few months. I continued writing poetry, exploring consciousness and my psychic studies when it hit me:

“I’m a poet. I can write the story in rhyme!”

I was now able to use the skills I had learned in psychic development to open up my intuitive channels and consciously tune into my creative muses. 

Then, over an 8-month period, scene by scene, the epic poem "2318" would simply flow.

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